It has been since September 2nd, since I have posted here. Pure neglect. My head was overtaken by motherhood and ongoing thoughts and to do’s for MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). At first I was a little disappointed that I didn’t make a whole 30 days straight to blog daily. But I know that is crazy to be so hard on myself. And that to blog again it needed to be significant…
What is significant is what called me back to post again. Significant because today is such a hard day of remembering as an American. I was 25 on 9-11. A girl by all means. Sure I was college educated, home owner, working, and married, but when 9-11 happened I was lost like so many. My big view of being invincible came crashing down around me as those towers crashed and planes fell from the sky.
Like most I vividly remember all that day and for Amon and I our 9-11 story started a few days before. We returned from a 5 day escape to NOLA (New Orleans) on 9/8. We had a great time as a young married couple in an amazing city that was pre-Katrina. It was almost magical except for Amon’s 102 fever right before we left. Then on 9/10, we returned to work. My sweet, hard-working yet not currently billable to a big client was asked to turn in his laptop because he was part of a large downsizing at his internationally known consulting firm. What a blow. And we thought that was a big and a bad day.
But when I was evacuated on 9-11 from the downtown core due to being close to the new Charles Evans Whittaker Federal Courthouse (named after my great-uncle but that is for another day), I was heading to my Amon. As I pulled into our 1 car, 2 beds, 1 bath sweet, post WWII Prairie Village house, I knew he was waiting for me. He received me with his hug and we cried together for hours in front of our t.v.
What I am thankful for that day is that he was already there waiting for me. Also for what he said that day will always be in my heart.
We had been married for 3 years but had been together as a couple for 6 and were toying with the idea of starting a family God willing. But on 9-11 I told him in no uncertain terms while sobbing the ugly cry, “That too much is wrong with this world and we shouldn’t ever have children.”
I was pretty adamant and lost. He took me and hugged me and said to me that isn’t what God wants. Even with all this tragedy, we have to live on and bring joy into this world. Or we really have let the enemy win because they have stopped us from dreaming and living. I cried so hard and knew deep down he was right.
On December 25, 2002 God fulfilled our dream of starting a family. What a gift and blessing our son has been to us each day. And when I think of 9-11 I am so thankful that my husband’s faith was strong when mine was lost.
My prayers go to the families and friends who lost thier loved ones so abruptly and tradgicly and to our nation as we remember to live on in honor of them. God Bless the United States of America.
Don’t let darkness keep you from dreaming and loving. Your light can shine through any darkness and by shining you light the path for others to follow.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. (NIV)